When schools turn into businesses

Dear parents,

Are you sure your child is getting the right education at school? Are you sure the marks he is scoring is what he deserves? Are you sure he worked hard enough to achieve the grades his report card shows?

How many of you actually demand to see the papers of every subject? Why do you trust your child blindly? Or the institution he goes to? Are you sure the teacher is knowledgeable enough to teach your child?

I have been closely associated to a school (one that is well known and having many campuses in Karachi) and its upsetting how the future of children is being ruined. High fees is demanded, low infrastructure is provided and when the parents complain, the compensation is dispersion of marks to pass a child. Not just 2/3 marks but as much as 12-15 marks in various subjects. A student was even passed when her paper went missing, one even when she didn’t appear in any of the exams. The point I am trying to highlight is not marks but how the coming generation will learn not to work hard and earn what they truly deserve. All their mistakes will be covered up without encouraging them to work hard or grow as a better person.

The concept of punishment has vanished. I remember during school days I used to be so fearful of my teachers and punishments that I would make sure my uniform, homework and grades are in the right order. Nowadays, if a child pokes or hits a teacher, or submits incomplete homework, or fails the exam; he has no fear of punishment, neither from the school nor from his parents. I just wonder how many criminals we are bringing up as these fearless kids.

Schools these days focus on events which involve singing competitions, dance competitions and play areas and fun fair. Where are those grand quiz competitions, art competitions, science competitions where children actually utilize their abilities to the most and learn for better? They grow while preparing for the competition, because they want to be the best but with their own hard work. The spirit of competition is lost and children just want to be number one even if they are not willing to work hard enough.

We talk about racism, cast, culture but we don’t realize what our children learn at school. Teachers are forced to dress up well, have perfect makeup, even demanded to quit hijab. Aren’t we teaching kids that only a person who is dressed well and looking at his best is a good person and if someone is inclined towards religion he is not considered to be good rather a threat and disgrace? A teacher wearing hijab is considered to be shallow and not eligible enough to teach at this particular school I am talking about. Well if they consider following the religion to be a degrading behavior then imagine what the students will actually be learning at that school.

Discussing further, it’s not just the appearance that is used to decide whether a teacher is good for the school but also his ability to satisfy the seniors of the school management. A teacher should be smart enough to involve in workplace politics and prove that he is right while others are wrong. He should be close friends with the seniors so he doesn’t have to do much work and always be saved by the senior’s favor even when he is wrong. If someone is not willing to involve in backbiting and wrongdoing, is honestly fulfilling his responsibilities, he will be targeted with all sorts of accusations and sacked from his job. On the other hand, teachers who are not even clear with the basic concepts and often dress up like beggars will be teaching for years in the same institution, just because they have strong bonds with the senior management.

It’s true that every child informs parents about his teacher, the good ones and even the bad ones. In my opinion the parents should have an option to select whether a teacher should stay in school or not based on the child’s results and what positive or negative reviews he has shared about a particular teacher. Maybe a teacher is strict but if the child is performing well in the subject the parents might want to continue with the teacher but if a teacher is very soft spoken but the child’s results are not satisfying then the teacher is not good enough because ultimately parents want their children to have the best of education and not spending money for free grades.

What defines you?

Who do you see in the mirror every morning? Is it that fat ugly girl who gets humiliated by people for her curves? Is it that dark complexioned girl who is made to feel inferior in family gatherings and workplace? Is it the girl who has become an introvert because of the acne scars? Who is she? Who are you?

Is it this skin color that defines you? Is it the plus size that is your identity? Why have you given the chance to anyone that they can judge you based on appearance? Why do you care so much about how the world looks at you? Why does anyone in this world have the power to make you feel inferior?

Wake up tomorrow morning and look into the mirror again. Find that strong girl who brings a smile to people’s faces when she meets them. Look at that girl who studies hard day and night to score well and build a bright future for herself and make her parents proud. Look at that girl who is a doctor and puts others health and happiness running around wards through the day when she herself is deprived of food and water. The girl who designs dresses so others can look pretty while she herself is comfortable in her jeans and tees. The girl who is an artist and fill up lives with colors but loves her old black sneakers.

Whether you are an engineer, doctor, pilot, designer, architect, writer, chef, photographer, student, artist or just a home maker; focus on the things you do for people that makes them smile. Look at how that girl in the mirror does wonders to fix around messed up lives of people. How one feels happier because of something that you have done by just being there in your right place at the right time. That is what defines you.

The happiness that you provide to people, that is exactly what you deserve. So never let anyone point out your appearance as a major flaw in you. Next time when someone calls you fat or ugly just reply ‘at least I don’t make people feel bad, like you were just trying to do’. Accept yourself however you are, because that’s how you were created to be; and the Almighty makes no mistakes.

Prioritize your smile and your happiness over other’s opinions. Love yourself and accept yourself. Next time when you look into the mirror, look at the girl you are, not the one the world wants you to be.

Color away the worries!

When was the last time you colored something?

Or painted?

Or sketched?

Don’t remember? Well then probably it’s been a very long time and you need to bring out the inner child and indulge in some art activity. I am not saying this for the sake of fun but for your betterment. If you are feeling upset, depressed, anxious, confused, angry, or anything that makes it difficult for you to think properly; just sit down and color for a while.

I built up this habit about two years back. I searched the internet for ‘adult coloring patterns’ and found drawing sheets that have detailed intricate patterns to fill in. I color them with different mediums depending on my mood. Sometimes I use color pencils or poster colors, chalk pastels, oil pastels, water colors, markers or sometimes simply shading with a regular pencil. It really helps me to relax. It decreases my anxiety and confusions and helps me to think clearly.

What happens is when I am involved in filling colors to these detailed patterns, I forget what was actually disturbing me. When I keep thinking about the problem I am never able to find a solution but when I am involved in art, and forget it for a while, then rethink about it I realize that the solution was so easy but because I was so tensed I was not being able to figure it out.

Unfortunately in our country art has always been considered a failure. But internationally, art is a great healer. Art therapy institutes are formed and people are treated for their mental health problems. Psychologists see a vast difference in people form the first session and even the patients say that it’s great how they can express themselves through colors and start recovering from their depression.

So next time you feel something is not going right, just disconnect from the world for a while and connect yourself with art. Also, if you have kids, build up this habit in them from now so they don’t grow up to be individuals finding it difficult to express themselves when they aren’t able to find words to speak.

Something for skincare!

So I use these two products thrice a week for my face. I have an acne prone skin and the products that best suit me are the ones that contain tea tree oil. After a lot of research over the internet and going through many articles and reviews I had started using these products mainly from The Body Shop or Boots.

What I do is I use The Body Shop foaming cleanser well over my face for good 8-10 minutes, massaging well using a facial electric cleanser brush. Then clean with water and wipe dry with a tissue paper. Then apply the Facial mask from Boots ‘Tea Tree and Witch Hazel with active charcoal’. Leave it on for 15-20 minutes as it mentions in the direction. Wash your face and wipe dry with a tissue paper.

Walla! You have a refreshing, glowing skin. Do not moisturize for at least half an hour, as your skin needs to breathe.